


Buenas noches mama

by Bbv



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angst, Bathtubs, Blood, Cutting, Death, Langst, M/M, Razors, Saddness, Suicide Notes, lance is a sad boi, mamas, suicide warning, triggering
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-25
Updated: 2017-08-25
Packaged: 2018-12-14 15:32:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,230
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11786100
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bbv/pseuds/Bbv
Summary: Lance cant take it anymore.They wont care anyways.He wont care.





	1. Meaningless goodbyes

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! This is a story i got permission to write from @orxngesodx 's comic on his instagram! This does include suicide and the death of a major character. If you get triggered by implied suicide and suicidal thoughts then please do not read. This will only be three chapters long. And since some a yall wanna comment about how this 'romanticizes suicide' and how i should be disgusted with myself; YOU DONT HAVE TO READ ITTTT

Locking the door and plugging the drain;

Staring into the mirror until the dead eyes of his reflection begins to fade from the thick steam of the water pouring into the tub.

He strips out of his clothes which pile beneath his feet on the hard tiled floors; stepping into the hot bath that has his skin _burning_ and his achey muscles relaxing. A thin sleet of metal slips between his fingers as he pulls his knees up into his chest, his once vibrant blue eyes gazing dully at the scars that he put there himself. One for each _painful_ memory. Each _horrible_ night where it was just too _quiet_. Each and every time that he felt he wasnt _good_ enough.. and for all the times it was confirmed that he _never_ _will be_.

His tear ducts had withered away during these long months of putting his life on the line for something he never signed up for. For people that didnt even _appreciate_ him.

Not a tear slipped down his cheek as he drew a fine line across his wrist. Deep and clean. Blood dribbling down his arm and into the bath. He stared at the liquid. His _life_ , becoming as _useless_ as he was as it poured from the slit.

He made a few more all the way down his arm before letting it dangle out of the bath. His eyes closed and he let himself relax. This was it. This was the final straw.

Black hair clouded his thoughts. Thick black hair that fell over twilight eyes. His _favorite_ pair of eyes. Smooth pale skin that _never_ needed to be taken care of and pink lips that he just wanted to kiss and never stop kissing; Making them _his_.

Lance almost seemed to be smiling as his thoughts became hazy. Until one thought stood clear.

 _You're not good enough for him_.

And then his tears fell.

And they fell

And they fell until he could cry no more.

Until his breathing slowed to a pathetic soft rasping sound.

Until his eyelids were too heavy to open.

Until his life drained out.

He had failed everyone he had ever loved. Everyone that he loved who _didn't_ and would _never_ love him back.

He failed his team.

He failed himself.

He failed keith.

He failed his mama.

 _Oh_ , his _mama_..

The rasping of his breath caught up to him.

Could he even remember what she sounded like? What her hugs felt like when she wrapped her arms around him?

 _Would she be there when he woke up_?

Lance was slipping under the water now; blood falling from his fingertips onto the floor.

He caught one soft breath before he went under.

_"Buenas noches.. mama.."_

 


	2. Finding him

Keith had walked down every corridor of the castle, Had checked through every single room and hiding place, and even under all the beds.

And could _not find lance_.

"Where the hell are you.." he grumbled as he walked down the halls. He asked everyone he bumped into if they saw lance.

No one had seen him.

He decided to take a turn back to  
Lances room; having a strange feeling that he needed to check there again. He stood in front of the blue paladins door; waiting for it to open. When it did he stepped inside; checking under the bed and in the closet- until his eyes moved over to the bathroom door. He stared for a few quiet moments; then reached for the knob.

It was locked.

"Lance?? Lance are you in there??" He asked and knocked on it. "Ive been looking _everywhere_ for you. Lance?" It was quiet behind the door. The hushed sounds of sloshing water the only thing resounding out of from behind the metal.

Keith didnt like this; his instinct telling him to rip the door from its hinges. "Lance?? Lance please- _open up_!" He punched his fist forward.

The door swung open.

And Keiths heart _shattered_.

"L-lance..?" Keith shakily whispered; collapsing to his knees beside the bath. The boys slit open wrist was floating on top the water; a stream of red flowing out of it.

His beautiful brown skin was pale now.. his hair sticking to his forehead.

His lips looked chapped.

His eyes werent opening.

_I want to see that beautiful blue.._

Keith still looked down at the body in shock; his hand coming up to carefully grip onto lances own.

"L-lance?" He whispered; his other hand coming to push away the hair on lances forehead. "Lance.. Lance _why_.." he choked; a sob arising from his throat.

_He couldnt breathe._

_He couldnt think._

_He couldnt move._

_Why would he do this?_

What made him so fucking _selfish_ as to leave keith alone?

 _Stranded_?

He never got a chance to _tell_ him.

_Now he never will._

Because lance was _gone_.

His cold, limp hand in keiths a sharp reminder of what once was.

_Of what will never be._

Keiths screams of heartbreak could be heard through the vast emptiness of space. 

Emptiness that will _demand_ to be felt by the red paladins broken heart. 


	3. The note

_Dear whoever finds this note first,_

_I am sorry._

_Im sorry im not strong enough to be the reliable paladin that voltron so desperately needs; and im sorry I lack in what makes a good teammate,_

_A good friend._

_I know youll find someone better to replace me, it shouldnt be that hard. Hunk is closer to pidge now then he ever has been with me, so i rather doubt ill be missed in the 'best friend' category._

_Pidge always just found me as a nuisance towards her work so at least she'll be relieved of my presence._

_Shiro, my childhood hero, wont ever notice me. He hasnt and he will not._

_Heh,_

_Maybe now he will._

_Princess allura, the most beautiful in the galaxy; constantly telling me to shut up even when im not even talking to her. Thinking im a bother and a flirt-_

_A fuckboy._

_Now she wont be as annoyed i guess._

_Coran, thanks for trying to cheer me up in these past weeks. Even though it seems like the help was useless now, it made my last few days just a little more bearable._

_Keith,_

_Fuck, keith.. i wish i had the courage to say this to you in person.. and I am very sorry you must read it from the writing of a dead man, but.._

_I love you._

_I always have; and I think I always will. For as long as I am in your memories. If you do not feel the same i dont doubt you; but please.. dont forget me._

_Please dont forget what I lived for._

_My wishes are for this note and my body to be returned to earth and my family. They probably wont be able to handle seeing me like this, but they most likely think that ive been dead since the Garrison._

_There is another letter under this one._

_That one is for mi mama only. Leave it for her to open._

_Thank you for taking me beyond the stars; and above my expectations of what being a pilot is all about. Thank you for making my dreams come true even if it was for but a short while._

_I will never forget the bravest people ive ever met._

_Try not to forget about me._

_Sincerely,  
   Lance McClain_


End file.
